La fotografia ferma il tempo.
December 7, 2007
Filed under Aodin, Friends and Family, Little Sushi, Married Life, Photog, Wishlist
Photography stops time. My beautiful friend Sara from Rome said that on her Flickr stream, and it hit me. God how I wish it were true. How I wish I could have just stayed right here, in this moment and never moved beyond it:
It was sunny, I was happy, and Aodin was still with us. It was warm and beautiful. I was with my sweet husband. My smile was genuine and warm, not touched by the sadness that never totally leaves me now.
Maybe I don’t mean it. Maybe I don’t really want time to have stopped in that moment. Maybe I do.
It never seems that way at the time, but you’ll get to a point where you won’t want to look back. You’re having a rough time but it shall eventually pass when it’s time. I had a conversation with a friend once about going back to change things and this is what I told him. I would not want to go back into my past to change a single thing. Every hurt I’ve had and every mistake I’ve made have shaped me into who I am. If I change a single bit of it then it may change who I am today and I kinda like me.
Hugs to you and don’t forget hubby either. Remember that the past looks nice but if sit and stare too long you’ll miss your ride to the future.
Wow rainypete is very wise. What an amazing comment.
It’s a beautiful picture and I think that is the gift, to be able to look back and remember that happiness as a good thing without wanting to go back. I’m still trying on that front.
*hugs*
It’s (what’s that expression?) a double bladed sword. But, there is one thing and that is that time cannot be stopped no matter how hard we fight against it. And even though sometimes time hurts us very badly, it heals us all the same.
<3.
Oh Heather, photos like that must be so hard! The thing I keep coming back to is the amount of love present in that photo and the amount of love that is so evidently present in your life now. Love shifts, but you haven’t lost it!
Even I keep looking back at that photograph with some pain, H – so I can only imagine how you feel.
But Pete is right, eventually things will get easier and you will be looking at times like this from a precious future.
So sorry for your loss again, Heather, it makes me think of you every day and always you surprise me with the way you can be honest and coherent with your feelings.
You’re utterly amazing.
Beautiful photo, H. So pregnant and happy. I see me, in a way.
Oh, to stop the clocks. I wish I could say that I don’t want to look back, to go back. But I do. I really, really do.
What to say that hasn’t already been said so beautifully? You will feel happiness like that again, Heather, it won’t be quite the same because no moment is exactly the same and because of what you have gone through. I know you treasure Aodin’s memory and though his loss will colour every moment, so will the blessing he brought to your life.