I might have changed my mind about grad school…
I am feeling odd about this because I felt so sure when I made the decision not to go. I was feeling like I had to choose EITHER a family soon OR the higher education I had always told myself I would get. Plus, I wasn’t liking my choices as far as grad programs, and I felt like I would be spending a lot of time and money to settle for something not so great. After a behind-the-scenes tour of a museum, I was suddenly faced with the fact that I didn’t want to do any of the things my degree would prepare me for. So I decided not to go.
Mr. Pants and I got to talking this weekend though, and ended up coming to terms with the fact that there is no reason why I cannot have both a family AND my masters. So I found some programs that are still accepting applications, and one that really fits my interests a little more than the general ones I was looking at before. I think I am going to apply…
So here’s the favor: I need to talk to people, moms and dads, who have had/raised small children while in grad school, or are the significant others of people who have done so. I need to know what the major challenges are, so I know if I am prepared to face them. I need to know if it’s tough, which I can take, or nearly impossible, which might not be worth it. I know it’s going to be hard. I need to know how hard.
ANY help is awesome.
I have been reading your blog for a short while so I don’t “know” you well. First I’ll say that I am a guy and so not a mom, and that makes my experience different. I took 25 units a semester (a JC in the day, SDSU at night) I worked part time and was seldom home. I made time to spend with my son by taking him to the excellent day care at the JC where I could go and spend time with him between classes. Of course I was able to spend little time with my wife and was up constantly all night writing papers and reading. One agreement that my wife and I made when it came to disciplining was we were and are a united front, us against them always. If we disagreed, we adjourned to another room talked out our differences, then we came back and finished our business with our kids. If I can help you can drop me an email.
It’s gonna suck, but you just have to put your head down and do it. How’s that for advice? I’ve never been a parent, but I was a small child as my mother finished up her nursing degree. She would drive us to the park and let us play while she sat in the car and read textbooks.