16 Oct

From Sitting Still:

“There is a secret in our culture – it is not that childbirth is painful, it’s that women are strong”
– Laura Stavoe Harm

Yet another lesson I can take from my beautiful time with Aodin.  Pregnancy is an absolute miracle, a chance to view life differently.  Even though my pregnancy went nothing like I expected, I still got the chance to feel life growing inside of me, and it is a feeling I will never forget.

My precious husband told me the other day that he was having a hard time with this because I lost a son, but he never got to have one.  I had a direct, physical connection with Aodin that no one else really experienced.  And so now I look at my husband differently.  He is stronger than I ever knew, and I am proud to be his wife.


10 Responses to “Quotable”

  1. rainypete October 16, 2007 at 12:19 pm #

    It’s an often overlook truth that we Dads are outsiders until the children actually arrive. We are outside observers who get to watch a magical thing take place. Able only to look on in wonder and oine fo rthe day that we get to meet our children. I remember saying to my wife that I couldn’t wait to meet our babies, unlike her who already knew them but was waiting to see them. I can imagine the heartbreak of it all for Aaron and want to offer him whatever consolation I have. If nothing else he has reaffirmed the amazing depth of love you two have for each other. The strength you both have is astonishing and impressive. Remember he is hurting too and take care of each other. Soon enough you’ll be finding your new pace within the world together.

  2. rainypete October 16, 2007 at 12:19 pm #

    p.s. my spelling sucks today!

  3. Bre October 16, 2007 at 4:14 pm #

    I am consistently amazed and humbled by the depth of devotion and love between you and your husband!

  4. Wondy October 16, 2007 at 7:53 pm #

    I too, am constantly surprised and delighted by the things Mr Pants does for you – and for your family. He is rarer than gold and far, far more precious, and I respect him so much for his strength and for making you happy. I am so glad that he can tell you how he feels, too – since I must admit I often feel for the men in these situations.

    I love you H and Pants is more than a deserving partner for you, so by extention I love him too!

    C x

    Ps. When you feel strong enough can I bother you for my cloned version of Mr. Pants? x

  5. girlinthecrosswalk October 17, 2007 at 5:25 pm #

    There are no words to describe how beautiful the love that you and Aaron share is.

  6. brandy October 17, 2007 at 6:51 pm #

    I appreciate reading how much you are learning from all of this. I had never thought of what a dad went through, your words (or his words you shared) have brought clarity to the idea. I am wishing you well and join Bre in saying that it is humbling to read such devotion.

  7. Alison October 18, 2007 at 12:27 am #

    I am so very sorry for your loss! May you and your
    husband find peace!

  8. Mike Holman October 20, 2007 at 3:25 am #

    I’m glad you are here to write such amazing work.

  9. Ally October 21, 2007 at 1:14 am #

    What an amazing insight–and how awesome that
    your husband was able to articulate it and shared it
    with you. It makes sense, but I have never heard a
    man express his loss that way.


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