Make It Better

1 Apr

Today I ran down the block to get a sandwich.  While I was standing in line to pay, I noticed a card in their little rack of greeting cards.  This one had a big blue mountain swallowtail superimposed over a bunch of yellow daisies.  It’s a thank you card, but I bought it and hung it at my desk, since it looks an awful lot like my blue morpho, and I love the bright colors.


Now I want to try and make it better for other people, and I am hoping you guys can help me figure out some of the logistics.  For a long time now I have been thinking about ways I can help other families who have lost children.  I’ve decided that I want to start making bags/baskets/boxes to send to families who’ve lost.  I am thinking that starting a website where people can register themselves or other people might be the best way to do it, as well as making donations to hospitals.

  • a picture frame or ornament or something that can be kept in their house, preferably something with some sort of angel wings or something on it and a small phrase about “gone too soon…” or something like that.  Maybe something like this.
  • some sort of memorial jewelry
  • definitely some literature on grief.  What I would like to do for that is put together a booklet with some of OUR stories, those loss moms and dads who read my blog, and the people they know too.  I want to include some pictures of our angels, and whatever else you would want to contribute.  I think advice from someone who has been through it is priceless.
  • maybe a short list of tips?
  • emergency numbers – national crisis centers, suicide hotlines, etc…
  • gift cards to places where the moms can buy one new outfit?  I know that when I got out of the hospital, I couldn’t wear my pre-pregnancy stuff yet and the idea of wearing my maternity clothes was just too much.  I spent days in scrubs from the hospital.
  • a cute stuffed animal, something soft and cuddly for the sake of some small, tangible comfort
  • some sort of peaceful photography?  nature scenes?
  • A list of links to sites that carry memorial jewelry, plaques, garden stones…

Ideally, all of this stuff would be donated, and I’d pay for mailing the boxes out to families.  I want to ask you guys for help with the details.

  1. Send me your stories, pictures, thoughts to include in the booklet.  Whether you’re a parent who has lost, a parent who hasn’t, or just someone who cares… anything goes.
  2. What can I call this whole thing?
  3. Any ideas for something to include for Dads?  I was thinking about some kind of keychain or something?

Ideally I would keep this to things people would donate, or that I could put together myself without spending money.  I also want this to be something that goes out a little delayed… maybe after a month or so?

I am, obviously, still putting together ideas so anything you have to say about it would be awesome.  I fully intend to give credit to anyone who helps out with this too!  I have wanted to get involved with helping grieving parents ever since we lost Aodin.  I tried to contact my local hospital about getting involved with the production of the beautiful memory box they sent us home with, but in the end they never called me back… so I figure I might just try it on my own!


9 Responses to “Make It Better”

  1. Shell April 1, 2008 at 2:01 pm #

    I don’t have any suggestions for you, having never been there myself, but I would love to donate if and when you get this up and running….beautiful idea.

  2. Becky April 1, 2008 at 2:59 pm #

    I’m thinking on this. I’ll be back.

  3. ashleigh April 1, 2008 at 3:49 pm #

    This is such a beautiful idea. I’d be happy to help however I can….

  4. CLC April 1, 2008 at 6:37 pm #

    What a great idea. Very thoughtful of you. I’ll have to brainstorm on names for it.

  5. c. April 1, 2008 at 9:53 pm #

    Love these ideas, H. I want to take a think on it before I give any suggestions. I feel motivated to do something for moms who have lost babies, too. I cannot NOT do something knowing that other babies have suffered the fate our babies have suffered.

  6. Amy April 2, 2008 at 7:13 am #

    I have tons of ideas but I will have to email you, I’m sure…give me a couple of days and I’ll get back with you!

  7. Rainypete April 2, 2008 at 11:54 am #

    I shall plunder my photos to see what I can get. If there’s anything you can think of that you'[ve seen let me know and I’ll dig it up.

    Have I mentioned lately how awesome you are? I love that you’re doing this and it strengthens my resolve to get myself in the NILMDTS database sooner rather than later.

  8. Antigone April 4, 2008 at 4:38 pm #

    Just a handwritten note/card/letter. You could organize a website which puts together women who’ve recently experienced a loss and women who are veterans of the experience.


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